"You can scream at a phone for six months straight and Philip Larkin won’t accuse you of fucking it up. A phone doesn’t know, because it’s full of cogs made of light or something, whereas a baby is filled with a kind of haunted meat, probably. I don’t know."

Eclipse Us All at Elephant Words

Maureen had a personal rule against asking questions she already knew the answer to. It was a behaviour she found frustrating in others. However, sometimes it was hard to avoid.

I’m back at Elephant Words for the first time in a long time. First prose I’ve done in ages. Eclipse Us All - is.gd/rQzr34 - please read it, and if you like it, tell me!

(If you don’t like it, tell me that, too - all feedback is useful.)

"I ‘made it’ when we did our first issue. Everything else - the New York Times, even making a movie - is lesser than Love and Rockets, as far as I’m concerned, and everyone else should treat their work that way. It it’s your own work, it should be treated as the last thing, not the first thing."

Hemingway Meme - Six Words Enter, One Story Leaves

The last time people were talking about Hemingway’s six word stories, I did this over at nixsight.net:

2 lifeforms enter, three lifeforms leave.
Just drive, she said. Smoking. Bleeding.
Had the last laugh. Died funny.
Someone lost an eye. Exit fun.
She kissed he cried they parted.
I’m gunna keep on loving you.
High concept? Just another donkey show.
200 guns, 100 men.
Dissatisfied wife finds love with midget.
Her last words were his trigger.
“I didn’t mean to…” it said.
Unaided flight ”fun”? Not so much.
Superheroes but, you know, grown up.
The kid in burberry buys it.
Final act, nothing resolved, closure MIA?
Studio 60 mid-season turnaround imminent?
… and suddenly, the creatures stood revealed…
“Brevity”, he said, “arsehole of wit.”
“Wash off the blood? What blood?”
I have to eat her all?
“So that’s what humility tastes like…”
You’ve been drive-by queer-guyed!

Added 31/10/2006:
Two dads. No mum. Hilarity ensues.
Two dads. Estranged mum. Hilarity ensues.
6 friends. No others allowed in.
Hippy parents BUT ultra conservative son!
Retard ends up saving the day.
Whole damn journey is homoerotic metaphor!
My stupid dog, the alien overlord?
My drooling dog, the second coming?
Two days to retirement. Already dead.
Ripped it up and started again.

Anyone got anything to add?

Right on.

sulman:

Some indulgent silliness. 

Imagine that it is the mid Nineteen-Nineties. You are an intelligence officer working universities for potential talent; your aim is to recruit those that will continue the work of the establishment; the cold activities of defending the country and advancing her influence. Murky, deceitful work well beyond the simplistic allegiances of left and right. 

Control of the left is merely one facet of this; it also happens to be part of your section’s responsibility. Oxbridge is a traditional source of recruits, and among the candidates there is a girl there with a suitable background for this kind of role. Extremely bright, idealistic, middle class, and from parents with a gentle socialist leaning. A student already active and influential within left-leaning student organisations. 

Recruitment is merely a patient matter of flattery, advancement and material reward, with one eye on the greater good. “You’re already at the top of the intellectual tree. Why not make a difference from the inside?”

Post-graduation, with a sandstone university behind her, and some appropriate references from the faculty, placement within a leading magazine publication is easy enough. She must be self-styled as the ‘voice of her generation’. The writing style - virtually every article framed within a simplistic sixth-form ideology - has to be clear and repetitive, if well below the quality of her academic output. It doesn’t matter if the tone resembles from cold war Pravda, with a contemporary influence. Few reading will be old enough to recognise that anyway. The goal of this particular approach is empathy  and access to groups of interest. With press as a platform, inconspicuous movement between targets is easy.

Of utmost importance - it will not be noticed - is that she does not engage in any actual investigative reporting. Especially not in the direction of friendly places. An exposé on immigrant labour in the Middle-East - truthfully sourced or not - would be counterproductive for interests in those countries. Write about Palestine all she likes - she is expected to - but stay away from looking too closely at internal issues within Israel. Stick to domestic networks. She should write about her friends. Tell her handler about her friends. Tell her handler about their friends. Tell her she’s making a difference. 

My buddy, keeping his brain ticking over, mining a seam of genius.

A few things I did over the last couple of days…

…in case you missed them:

Corporate Whoring: Graze Free Box Code
Because I love Graze boxes, they gave me this code for people to get a box free, and I get a discount if you use it.

Review: Too Much Sex & Violence #1 by Rol Hirst et al
Self-published small-town weirdness and intrigue, with a variety of cool artists providing support.

Review: Dark Judgement #1-2 by Richard Macauliffe and Conor Boyle
Horror shorts throwing a spotlight on the Dark Judges, set during classic Judge Dredd continuity.

Commentary: …Meanwhile, at MCM Expo
Wherein we at MOMBsite give David Wynne a platform to discuss his truly horrid Sunday at the event.

Self-Indulgent Bloggery: This Is How My Day Panned Out
In which I talk about MCM-Controversy induced paranoia, and encounters with a very old friend and JM DeMatteis, one of my comic writing gods. And chicken biryani.

Charity Faceweird: Movember 2011
I throw my hat in the Movember ring - with photos! - because, well, I like prostates, it winds my wife up, and it’s way easier than Nanowrimo.

Screenwriting Tip #707

screenwritingtips:

Keep track of story time. It doesn’t take a week to drive across two states, and funerals don’t usually happen the day after someone dies. Make a timeline if you have to.